My work explores the narrative I have with family in relation to who I am and how I have developed as a result of both positive and negative influences. Despite the dysfunctional dynamics that I experience with my family, I choose to remain connected to them. However, finding a balance in these relationships can prove difficult. I am interested in how I can represent these tedious yet impactful interactions and relationships with my family by using interdisciplinary media. I do this specifically through the use of concrete, rope, video, performance, audio of surveyed conversations as well as recorded speech of my own stream-of-consciousness and premeditated writing. To further fuel this concept, I use these materials in conjunction with my research regarding psychological approaches and varying modern conceptual artists, such as reading The Batterer as Parent: Addressing the Impact of Domestic Violence on Family Dynamics, written by Jay G. Silverman, Lundy Bancroft, and Daniel Ritchie, as well as studying artists such as Ellie Ga and her video, installation, and performance art. I do this to create work that is rich in concept, rooted in research, and digestible at many differing levels.
I am delving into the emotionally intimate space that I’ve lived in for so long where both these negative and positive beacons of connection exist as one unit. The stuffed wolf plushie that I’ve had since adolescence makes me think of the fond, warm memory of my mother gifting it to me, yet at the same time, I’m reminded of my bratty nagging that begged her to get it for me in the first place when we didn’t have the money for it to begin with. Both of these memories exist together as one within the small body of the soft yet haunting plushie, yet I still keep it despite the negativity attached to it. Along with capturing moments like these, I am aiming to share my findings for reasons I have yet to discover, along with reasons I am already aware of. I already know the dysfunction that exists within my family, yet I want to know more about where it started, how much it has truly affected each of us, and if anything can be done to stop it. If whether these answers lie within each individual, my family as a whole, or if there aren’t any answers at all. All I know is that I feel an intuitive drive to discover these answers, with the hope that these answers do exist, and that the dysfunction can finally stop. But even so, as I search for answers, analyze my past, and explore the coexistence of these positive and negative experiences, I find that my discoveries and inquiries support my choice to remain connected to my family, as I am jointly suspended between moments of uplifting love and weighted negligence.
contact: melchiorrec2@winthrop.edu
